Im Not Ok

My smile is the biggest lie i tell. my smile says that i am happy, that i am ok  well its a lie. in not ok and have not been since the beginning of summer. i cant remember truly laughing at anything without faking it. its like i get put down anytime and every time i try to show my feelings. no one seems to care enough to asks me how i am felling and if im alright. maybe then my smile would be the truth. maybe then i wouldn't be so messed up.